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1. My parents quarreled, and my dad said angrily: "I roll it out for you!"
. When I was in college, I heard a girl ordering: Master, fried a plate of hot and sour potato shreds Don't put potatoes!
. When I was looking for a job, the examiner asked me who graduated from.
The I was going to say 2000 in 2000. As a result, I said excitedly: "Two thousand years ago ..."
, Said: "Confucius students.
4. Tigers do not get cats, you should be sick!
5. I: That is our physics teacher. .
The classmates: What is it?
me: chemistry ...
6. One day when I was in school, After the classmates took it to me and said, "Your mother is looking for you. "
It answered the phone and said casually:" Men and Women "
7. Once the mother of my classmate in the bedroom called, I was used to saying "he is not there", but this time I want to say "I have gone out". R n
8. My brother handed me an ice cream, and I bite a bite and yelled, "I was burned to me! "
9. Go to Li Ning to buy shoes with my sister. My sister said:" Miss, how much is this shoe a pound? " "
10. Our unit has a car pick -up at work in the morning, because the car is not large. Once, one mm has no seat after getting on the car. Saying hello: "Moo, you sit on my ass! "I always laughed at the bus ~!
11. When I was in college, a student and I argued with me. Stupid!
12. When I was a kid, the popsicles of the popsicles were pushed on a bicycle and sold. Once, I listened to a aunt in the house and shouted: fresh ice cream, hot. )
13. One day I went to my classmates for dinner and drank some wine. Her father came in suddenly. He wanted to call his uncle. As a result, he said wrong and said, "Dad, here! "~~ Han! The big gang classmates laughed at
14, ktv at a time, a song, a mm shouted: Give me a" double Jaylen "of the stick in the first week .... ..
15. The teacher sent a paper for the previous exam. The girl behind took one more and shouted "Teacher, I have it, I have it." As a result, the boy next to him said "I was me Yes, it is my "the whole class burst into the cold ~~~
16. One evening, when I encountered an acquaintance, I said," Early "...
17. In the evening, a family of friends entered the house and announced loudly: "Today I look at the Midnight version of the American is fierce (the American version of the Midnight Bell)! "
18. Due to a chance to travel, I want to go to the Bank of China for maintenance equipment in a certain place. The knife "sweat! At that time, I meant to buy a screwdriver. I didn't notice that I was wrong. At this time, the female driver kept watching me very aggrieved and said," Brother, I am going to get off work. "At the time, I was very angry and said fiercely," What car you are going to get off work at the hotel? "The female driver looked at me and I was about to collapse," Brother, I don't want to find a car after buying a knife, you can find a car again. "I know that I said it was wrong. I quickly explained it for a long time. Now I think about it. I don't feel right for a female driver.
19. The political teacher said in a lecture: "Let me give an analogy below", and then I feel wrong, and said, "For example. "
20. During college, I just bought a mobile phone, got a mobile card, and asked for 10086 artificial stations. I heard the lady of the talk staff politely said: Our ground moves with business ... The whole dormitory laughs
21. My husband is particularly thin. Once I was in a hurry, "Husband, see you thin Like a pig! "
22. The original text of the broadcast draft: Two gangsters injured me 110 police officers and fled
.
(Huang Feihong's reincarnation?!)
23, a colleague, when he went to the driver's license, he said a classic to the examiner:
Report instrument, the examiner is normal ~~~~~~
24. Remember one time, and go to KFC with a sister. To the chicken wings ..., it was hard to turn her, and she laughed at everyone as soon as she opened. She wanted to say "Miss, come to a chicken leg burger", but it turned out to be a "calf, come, come, come, come, Burger "
25. MM tells me that KFC's new" flesh is connected "and asked me to take her to eat.的肯德基小姐来了句：请给我两个“血肉模糊”，谢谢！.............rnrn 无地自容-_-！rn
6. A boy saw his uncle: "Buy a lot, two dishes! "
舅:" This child, so big, not even people! "
7. A very shy male classmate went to the cafeteria for breakfast. The master asked him in the window:" What do you want? " He lowered his head and said, "I want ... I want ... a bun and a bun. "The master stared at him for a long time and asked," What do you want? Say it again! "I want a bun and a bun ... Oh. Do not! A bun and a bread! "
28. A classmate called his friend's house and the other party's grandfather answered.哐 Hang the phone ...
29, a buddy, once he appreciated the girl who had been in his long -term care of his long -term confession to her. Two sitting for a long time, he gathered the courage to the girl Say: "Do you have a boyfriend? The girl replied shyly: "No", he was ecstatic: "Can you be my boyfriend?" "
30. The wife asked blame: You don't even know your grandma's name?
.
The wife was surprised: What?
Ilads to change their mouth: No, I died when my grandma was seven years old!
31. Mom goes out Before going to work, I told me: "Put your clothes in the refrigerator and picked all the dishes in the washing machine ~~~~~~
32. After seeing his wife, he screamed in habitual: "Mom!"
A person's life is like shit, and sometimes you have worked hard to come out just a fart. Although you are a teeth! Don't be sad, the teeth are very good! Dental tooth can be planed sweet potatoes, rain can cover the chin, drink tea can be separated from tea, and picnic can be used as a knife and fork. Do you say whether the dental teeth are top!
The family Shunzhi, life Kangxi, character Yongzheng, career Qianlong, everything Jiaqing, prospects, wealth Xianfeng, internal and external Tongzhi, Qianqiu Guangxu, Wanzhong Xuantong!
I is a green onion, standing in the wind and rain, who dares to get me big sauce, X his ancestor! Pass through the south ~ Cross the north ~ I drank water behind the toilet, pressed the legs on the train lane, and kissed with a fool. I went to the mountains and hit the tiger ~ Shaolin Temple has practiced martial arts, Zuo Qinglong, right white tiger, often took Cjlington as two hundred and five, and also feed the tiger with Shakyamuni! Dance on the pyramid, Jesus' head drums.
I am in the rivers and lakes, but there is no legend about me!
About thongs: In the past, take off the panties to look at the ass; now, pull out Looking at the underwear ...
It is like a fly lying on the glass with a bright future, but I can't find the way out.
I hit the corner of the corner unknowingly, lying on the ground several stars!
. I heard that women are like clothes, and brothers are like hands and feet. In retrospect, I ran naked for 19 years!
. The brothers of the dormitory decided to implement the following punishment for Zhang She's supervisor:
Themium rod full of old Chinese medicine advertisements, full of tears and affectionate shouts: My illness finally saved!
I, on IQ, I can answer 8 right -handed turns in 10 brains; on my knowledge, I have read books for 8 years at the age of 10; the papers only, within 10 minutes, I can dictate a beautiful text, I can dictate a beautiful text, I can dictate a beautiful text, After recording, you can post up to 8 words, and you can publish it. On memory, 10 phone numbers can be remembered once, I can remember 8; on endurance, urine at 10 o'clock in the morning, I can stick to the second to the second. It is not withdrawn at 8 o'clock in the evening ...
The mice never waste the time of the evening, but we humans waste one third of the daily people? "This ... just like a teapot, the buttocks are burning red, and he still has the most" damaged "person in the mood to whistle now:" You really TMD is a small Japanese "
Work intentionally, live intentional, and live like a person intentionally
When his wife celebrated his birthday, the husband bought a pair of jewelry for his wife. The wife watched the jewelry of this value. After watching, the wife said, "Dear, if you buy me a Mercedes -Benz car, isn't it more affordable? "
" Yes, "the husband said blurted," Unfortunately, the Mercedes -Benz sedan is not fake! "
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